What a blur. The only way this weekend can be summed up without me tearing up. A fucking blur.
I've now come to understand the real vulnerability it takes to exhibit your work in the real world. The Internet can be a buffer of sorts, where you and your posi-gang of mutuals reside in a bubble. A safety bubble filled with unconditional love and admiration. But out there in the real world you're open to it all. Exposed to every element. And this is the thought that leads to my panic attack, 3 days before the exhibition is to open for the public.
Let's go back in time, 8 months back to be precise. I get the email I've been waiting for.
September 2017: Welcome
thank you for coming to the selection workshop for the barbican's young visual art group. we are happy to announce you've been chosen as part of the group this year, well done!
I will be exhibiting work at THE flipping BARBICAN. Crazy. I don't stop smiling for a week.
The first session comes around. I walk into a room full of eccentric characters; they all look like they should be in a vice or i-D column about the visual underground scene in london. I'm home!
November 2017: Community
A few months pass, when we are given our first assignment. Responding to the word
My natural response: to write. A poem of sorts, called Rawalpindi Nights. About migrating from my town in Pakistan, to a suburb in London and feeling alienated, even after 13 odd years.
March 2018: Brainstorming
I think back to Rawalpindi and all those years I spent there. The sense of community there and the lack of community I have experienced in suburbia can't just be down to "cultural differences." First of all, that's vague. Second, things aren't so black and white. What I don't want is a criticism of my experiences in suburbia, it is what it is and something I've made my peace with. What would be more fitting is a commentary, of my time spent in Rawalpindi.
I figure out my aim in this month: To embed something that is present in Rawalpindi, into London.
April 2018: Developing
Festivals. The one thing that brings all the neighbors together in Rawalpindi. But festivals also bring communities together in London. Look at Notting Hill Carnival, concerts and gigs, the world cup. Alright, scratch that.
There's something else missing. In the everyday. Something we do that lacks here in Suburbia.
*cue magic light bulb moment*